my muscles are aching!
but i feel fit HAHA well, at least the pain keeps me awake throughout the day.
its been tiring lately. Real tiring.
i think i have to considering sacrificing some stuff frm now onwards.
as usual, i'm NOT supposed to be here.
was online for grp work, so i decided to stop here for awhile. Hah.

my weekly timetable: (all after sch)
Mon-PL prayer meeting, physics tuition
Tues-off! (:
Wed-mt compo class, bible study
Thurs-leaders drill, A maths tuition
Fri-CCA

shoots. and Now, they are packing my saturdays with CCA too.
forcing me to miss out so much of my cell.
i hate this.
but this is life yea?

i almost broke dwn today, in sch.
nope. it has nothing to do with my tiring sch life watsoever.
its smth else.
during mass prayer cell after sch.
i felt so lost, irritated and Angry at the same time.
i dun wish to pt fingers in here.
but its really getting on my nerves.
i mean, you all claim lyk "reach out! yea!"
and then simple commitment lyk today, you cant even keep.
i noe it isnt abt forcing. but hey, if we cant even be faithful in little things, how do we expect the unsaved to be touched?
i noe its tiring.
and almst everyone thinks tt simple meetings lyk this arent impt.
tts why they dun turn up.
but we have to make the first step wat.
if everyone just thought the same way. of course we wont get anywhere.
you think its useless, i noe you've been feeling dry.
but wont you just try.
i'm sick and tired of always having to push and encourage others.
its not lyk i was never tired.
i was.
i felt lyk giving up too.
but i learnt. maybe you shld try learning to stand up on your own.
and quit running away.
aiya.
i'm not angry but i just feel lyk spilling all these out.
if we cant even help ourselves, who Will help the unsaved?
wat for talk so much abt reaching out when we cant even do it right ourselves.
crap larh
i'm sorry for my bad attitude.
but i dun feel good.
try being in my sheos and you will noe.
you'll noe how it feels to be encouraging others, how it feels to press on.
i'm going through wat you Are going through.
just learn and press on alright, i'm trying too.



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