the hearts are all over tonight.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
DAPHNE and DIANE
(:

celebration on thurs brought old scenes up in my head.
the times when we had such a crowded and noisy cell.
and it gave me a chance to chat with people like stinky again.

everyday,
i find myself with more reasons to fast and pray.

i just want to get over with this J2 year thing and have my normal life back.
but then again,
this isnt the way i want to live life,
it defeats the meaning of it.
i knew that ct meant well when she came up to speak to me.
but its so difficult to work when everyones breathing down my neck.
i feel so Suppressed. its getting harder and harder to breathe.
they were so blant and law-biding with me,
i lost my grip and snapped back.
but apologizing in the later evening gave me a new chance to prove myself again.

training was crazy.
i tried to stop her from kneeling
but it didnt help.
it was devasting.
if theres anything that i can do,
i would love to play this nationals well.
please, i just need a few more opportunities.
--

singing in the karaoke room after cell was so Fun (:
i wished lana and DDs were around too.

you know,
if i had all the time in the world,
i would love to be down at the pool swimming with you too.
but we both know that this isnt the case.
i miss you alot, theres so much i need to tell you.

its a mutual thing.